I just want to remember this

Its sometime after midnight but I can't sleep and wanted to pull these thoughts out of my head while they are still fresh. Mason's movement monitor went off right before midnight. I don't think he really stopped moving/breathing for 10 seconds. I think the sensor has a hard time picking up his movement now that he sleeps all over the place and on his belly. Either way, the noise from the monitor probably jolted him enough that his movement could be picked up again. This is usually the case anytime the monitor goes off and I can usually ignore it and go on about my business. But, sometimes if he doesn't move into a position where the monitor can sense him again it will go off again and I didn't want everyone to wake up if that happened. So, I decided to go to his room and move him towards the middle of the crib. Of course, as soon as I opened the door to his room his little head popped up. He was none too happy when I rolled him over and he let me know it. I knew he would probably keep screaming if I left because he probably thought I was coming in to get him up to play. I decided to pick him up from the crib and try some snuggle time. Mason is not a big on cuddling unless we are snuggling in my bed first thing in the morning. He likes to be held, but he usually wants to have his head straight up and wants to see what is going on. I sat down with him in the glider, but the screaming only got worse. He has not let me rock him in the glider in months so I wasn't too surprised with that. So I stood up and started doing the old rocking/singing routine that used to be a part of our bed time routine until it he started fighting going to sleep. To my amazement, after a few minutes Mason put his little head down on my shoulder and let me rock and sing to him while he relaxed. I had forgotten how good it feels to have a baby snuggled on my shoulder like that. I started crying right there. I miss rocking my baby. He is growing so fast and before long he won't fit in my arms like that. But, tonight he let me hold him and rock him in the dark of his room and I loved every second of it. I rubbed his back, sniffed the yummy baby smell on his hair, and enjoyed the feeling of his face touching my neck. Being a mom is so tough sometimes, but not this. This was perfect and I wish I could bottle it up forever.