Zero

That's how much my body is for Aubrey to come out. I had my 39-week check up today and during my internal, the doctor said my cervix is not ready at all. No dilation, no effacement, nothing. Plus, Aubrey hasn't dropped at all. I think I am a lot more upset today than I was last week. Although the internal didn't feel as bad this week, I am more upset that I'm not even showing signs of being ready for this to be over. I am so tired of being pregnant. Last night was the final straw. I kept me and Todd both awake most of the night because I couldn't get comfortable so I couldn't go to sleep. Then, once I did finally go to sleep, I woke up having to go to the bathroom. Which would wake Todd up. Then, I would have to start the whole trying to get comfortable process all over again to follow it up with waking up again 3 hours later to pee. It made for a really long night so hearing that my body is not ready for her to come out is pretty frustrating because I am past ready. Dr. Gorsuch said we won't start talking induction at this point because it could possibly lead to a C-section since my cervix isn't ready. Unless my cervix starts doing some work, the only way I am going into labor anytime soon is if my blood pressure spikes, I start having any preeclampsia symptoms, orAubrey stops moving, none of which I want to happen. She said if I haven't made any progress in 2 weeks, we will then talk about the induction. Greeeaat. That really scares me because I don't want her to get much bigger because I am scared I won't be able to deliver her and will still end up with a c-section. Ihate all of this not knowing. Why haven't scientists been able to figure all of this out? Why can't they predict when labor will start? I hate not knowing anything at this point. I've been so patient and calm throughout this entire pregnancy, but the patience is slowly wearing out. 2 more weeks seems like an eternity. The only good news I got today, well besides the info that Aubrey is doing great, is that I am the least swollen person they saw today. Yippie. I am thankful to not be swollen because I can't imagine being much more miserable today.

Everybody is driving me crazy. The "you're still here?" or "it will happen soon" comments are getting so old. Yes, I'm still here. You see me don't you. And I know it will happen soon, she has to come out, DUH! Or, everytime I call someone for something totally un-baby related I get "Oh, I thought you were calling to tell me you were going into labor." Like I have nothing else in my life right now to think or talk about except that. I know it's not about me anymore, but sheesh, I'm still here and breathing so I should matter too. I've started being such a smart ass about it and that's not good. I've been telling people "Nope, I am just a figment of your imagintation, I'm not really here" and that tends to shut them up. Combining the "miserable I'm done with this" attitude along with no sleep makes for a dangerous Amber.

Aubrey, dear, this is your mother. Please, please, please come out SOON! Before mommy gets herself in trouble with her big mouth.

And cervix, get it together. It's time to get to work so I can get this baby out!